Surrogate partner
Surrogate partners, formerly referred to as sex surrogates, are practitioners trained in addressing issues of intimacy and sexuality. A surrogate partner works in collaboration with a talk therapist to meet the goals of their client. This triadic model, composed of the client, talk therapist, and surrogate partner therapist is used to dually support the client and the surrogate partner therapist. The client engages with the surrogate partner therapist in experiential exercises and builds a relationship with their surrogate partner therapist while processing and integrating their experiences with their talk therapist or clinician.
Overview[edit]
The modality in which surrogate partners work is called surrogate partner therapy. This modality is used to address obstacles to physical and emotional intimacy that a client is unable to resolve through traditional therapy and requires the involvement of a partner. Clients’ presenting issues have commonly included sexual dysfunctions, lack of healthy intimate experiences, or traumatic history.
History[edit]
Masters and Johnson introduced the practice in their book Human Sexual Inadequacy, published in 1970. They believed that people could learn about sexual intimacy only by experiencing it. In their research, subjects that were partnered used these partners to aid in a series of exercises designed to help overcome sexual dysfunction. Unpartnered subjects were paired with "surrogates" who would take the place of a partner, work under the direction of a trained therapist, and act as a form of mentor for the client. In their research, all of the surrogates were women who were assigned to work with single men. Today, most surrogates are women, but a few are men.[1] The practice of Surrogate Partner Therapy reached its peak in the early 1980s with a few hundred surrogate partners practicing in the U.S. Since then, Surrogate Partner Therapy's popularity declined but reentered social consciousness after the 2012 film The Sessions, which depicts one surrogate partner's work with a disabled man. As of 2014, those practicing Surrogate Partner Therapy were still very few in number.[2]
Therapy[edit]
Since sexual problems are often psychological rather than physical, communication plays a key role in the therapeutic process between a patient and the surrogate partner therapist, as well as between the surrogate partner therapist and the talk therapist.
Surrogate partners offer therapeutic exercises to help the patient. These may include, but are not limited to relaxation techniques, sensate focusing, communication, establishing healthy body image, teaching social skills, sex education, as well as sensual and some sexual touching. Surrogate partner therapy begins with a meeting between the client, talk therapist, and surrogate partner therapist in which the goals of the client are discussed and the scope and arch of the therapy are established. Throughout the process, communication between surrogate partner therapist-client, client-talk therapist, and surrogate partner therapist-talk therapist is maintained.[6]
By definition, Surrogate Partner therapy is solely performed with single (unpartnered) persons. The surrogate partner therapist engages in education, often intimate physical contact, and only very rarely sexual activity with clients to achieve a therapeutic goal.[7] Some surrogates work at counseling centers, while others have their own offices.[8]
Articles[edit]
The 2003 Salon.com article "I was a middle-aged virgin", by Michael Castleman, discusses a middle-aged American virgin (Roger Andrews) and his therapy with the surrogate partner therapist Vena Blanchard.[9]