The Regina Monologues
"The Regina Monologues" is the fourth episode of the fifteenth season of the American animated television series The Simpsons. It originally aired on the Fox network in the United States on November 23, 2003. It was directed by Mark Kirkland and was the final episode written by John Swartzwelder. The episode sees the Simpson family travel to the United Kingdom for vacation. There, they meet several celebrities including Tony Blair, Evan Marriott, Ian McKellen and J. K. Rowling, who all appear as themselves. Later, Homer is arrested and locked in the Tower of London for accidentally crashing into the Queen's carriage. Meanwhile, Abraham Simpson journeys to find Edwina, his long lost love, who is voiced by Jane Leeves.
"The Regina Monologues"
Season 15
Episode 4
EABF22
November 23, 2003
The back wall is a Play-Doh Fun Factory press that creates clay figures of the Simpsons.
Plot[edit]
Mr. Burns withdraws a $1000 bill from an ATM, but he drops it and an updraft carries it away to the Simpsons' house, where it is found by Bart and Milhouse. Marge makes Bart and Homer put up fliers so that the person who lost the bill can reclaim it. No one can describe it correctly, so Lisa suggests that they spend the money on something for Marge. Marge desires a dream vacation, but decides against this because Homer always manages to ruin any trip they go on. After realizing he can make money from the bill, Bart displays it in a museum in his tree house. Mr. Burns visits and reclaims his money, forcing Bart to close his museum. However, Bart has made over $3000 from the museum, so he reconsiders Lisa's suggestion and decides to spend the money on a vacation for Marge. Grampa suggests they go to Britain, where he hopes to meet his long-lost love, Edwina. During World War II, he made love to her the night before he was shipped out to the front lines on D-Day (having been unaware that he actually was).
Upon their arrival in London, the family is greeted by the Prime Minister, Tony Blair, whom Homer mistakes for Mr. Bean. They visit London's tourist attractions, and later meet J. K. Rowling and Ian McKellen. Grampa tries to contact Edwina, whilst Bart and Lisa go on a "sugar rush" after discovering the joys of British candy. Homer and Marge rent a Mini Cooper and start to drive around London, but get stuck on the roundabout at Hyde Park Corner. After literally driving in circles for hours, Homer decides to break out of it, plows straight through the gates of Buckingham Palace and slams into Queen Elizabeth II's horse-drawn carriage, and is beaten by the Foot Guards.
At the Old Bailey, Homer is put on trial for causing harm to the Queen as well as wrecking her carriage. Representing himself (which Marge assumed would have made no difference), he humiliates himself by calling the Queen an impostor, since her luggage is inscribed "H.R.H." which he believes is short for "Henrietta R. Hippo", and mistaking the judge for a woman due to the wig he is wearing. The Queen, highly offended, demands that he be executed. At the Tower of London, where he awaits his execution, he is called from outside by his family and Lisa tells him that he can use a secret tunnel that Sir Walter Raleigh built to escape. However, the tunnel leads straight into the Queen's bedroom, and she calls her guards. Homer pleads with the Queen to find it in her heart to forgive him, and she allows him to leave the country on the condition that he and the rest of his family take Madonna back to America with him. As they prepare to leave, Edwina appears and introduces Abe to her daughter Abbey, who is essentially a British female version of Homer. Realizing he is her father, Grampa runs away quickly to the plane, while Homer appears smitten by his half-sister.